Recently, I listened to a talk by Dr. Marisa Peer. She is an author and therapist who works with international superstars, CEOs, royalty, and olympic athletes. Her technique is very simple. She helps people to realize that they are enough. Isn’t that really what is holding most of us back? We worry that we are not enough. We think we are not enough as a spouse, daughter/son, mother/father, friend, etc. and we are not enough in our work. We are always striving to be more, be better, be perfect, or we just give up all together, because we are sure we are never going to be enough. We may have been told by others that we are not enough for a very long time.
But, what if we just accepted that we are enough? It is very freeing, really. Stop right now and put your hand over your heart and say to yourself, “I am enough”. What feelings come up for you? Do you immediately think of a role where you do not feel like you are enough? Maybe you couldn’t even say the words?
Dr. Peer recommends saying, “I am enough” multiple times each day. She suggests hanging a sign with these words on the mirror in your bathroom. She suggests saying them over and over again while you are in the shower. You can also set phone alerts to go off throughout the day to remind you that you are enough. When we repeat something over and over again (in our minds and out loud), the mind doesn’t have any other choice but to eventually accept it.
Dr. Peer says this about this technique, “In my 25 years as a therapist, I’ve discovered that the root of so many modern problems—hoarding, excessive drinking, compulsive shopping, and over-eating—come right back to a need to fill the inner emptiness of not feeling “enough” with external things. The more you tell yourself you are enough, the more you’ll believe it. It sounds so utterly simple—and it is—and all you need is the commitment to do it and the belief that it will work.”
When I think about the people I work with every day, I can honestly say that almost none of them think they are enough. Many are feeling inadequate in almost every role they play. In my experience, when we don’t fix the emotional roots to our physical symptoms, it is very difficult to have true healing. What if the process could fast track by just convincing ourselves that we are really enough?
To me it seems worth a try. So, I have a sign on my bathroom mirror and I have phone alerts set up to remind me all day that I really am enough. When my mind starts to place judgement on me for whatever reason, I snap my fingers and say, “I am enough”. I joke with my friends and say that I retired from perfectionism. I really have, because deep down, I know….I am enough.
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One Response
Nice! Thanks Jen 🙂